the insanity bandwagon

the insanity bandwagon
Posted Wednesday, September 19, 2007 10:41 AM
the insanity bandwagon has arrived early this morning. this is for me to hop on and try to sort out the millions of thoughts that consciously awake my crowded mind the second I open my eyes. this morning- more of the theories of what happened that killed Julia.
from meds i took, herbal tea i drank, maybe a wrong yoga pose, dental bacteria, some weird rare genetic disease, caffeine, splenda? what the hell was it?
i've gone down a mental list, spent hours sitting in front of this computer, and poured over every book about stillborn babies. I must be a member of every single support group online there is. Reading others heartaches gives a relation, but when I see people who have had to endure the pain of going through this more than once...sorry I would just flip out.
Vent for the day- sorry for whoever is offended by this- but if I lost my baby at 7 wks and never felt her kick,never saw her on an ultrasound, had to violently have her pulled from my body by forceps and a vac and seeing this beautiful perfect yet- dead baby...this is not the same. I know it must be painful to have a m/c or repeated m/c and not know why....but did these people did not have the same experience. There should be a board on the nest just for stillborns, not pregnancy loss.
It's also a shame that there is not more awareness in our society for this kind of tragic event. Does anyone care that it is Infant Loss awareness day on oct 15? prob since not that many people want to be aware of it- or is it because there haven't been any celebs that it happened to. Only in America.

Posted by gigi_rafaelFiled under: stillborn loss [Edit Tags]
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